Holiday “sleep”

As we rush full tilt into the holiday season, I’m feeling the usually parental mix of anxiety, burn out, and perhaps a little bit of hope and joy that the kids are going to have a special Christmas. It’s extra bittersweet for me as I’m currently the hospital doctor for our pulmonology practice, and (as you may have heard) there have been a lot of sick kids this fall and winter.

It’s been a challenging few years for parents and it may feel like the hits keep coming. (Bomb cyclone on the peak Christmas travel days? Tripledemic?)

My kids are older now but I remember the stress of the holidays especially when travel was involved. Often the desire to have that perfect holiday led to a lot of anxiety. Can I leave work early to beat the traffic? How do I pack the car so that my kids don’t see the gifts from Santa? Will my older son have a night terror (which he always seemed to at my parents or mother in laws) and wake up the house at 2am on Christmas Eve?

There are a few things I’ve learned about these fraught times of year:

1. It’s not going to be perfect
2. You don’t have to make it perfect.
3. Sometimes the imperfection is what makes it memorable and special.
4. The “stuff” of the holidays– the gifts, the trappings, the food, matter a lot less than who you spend it with.

So, your kids may not sleep well. They may freak out, have a tantrum, or vomit on the airplane. Your own parents may annoy you a bit (I still remember my Dad fumbling with the coffeemaker on Christmas morning when the kids had us up at 5:30am. I mean, I love you Dad, but can you move faster than a stoned turtle BECAUSE THIS IS AN EMERGENCY).

Here’s what I want to say. No matter what you celebrate, no matter what your plans are, no matter whether you are traveling or staying home, give your self a break, try and relax, and recognize that you are a great parent whose kids are super lucky to have you. You are doing enough.

Here are a few posts that may help with travel (and set some realistic expectations).

​Vacation sleep: How to maximize shut eye when on the move​

​Night terrors, sleep walking, and sleep talking in children​

Hang in there

Craig