Frivolous

Hi Reader,

A reminder: my vision for the future is “a world no longer divided by religion.” This is the context for everything I’m writing now.

I recently realized one of those things I really want to hide from other people: I’m pretty frivolous.

I want people to think I’m deep and insightful and all that, but really I’m not. Not very. I really like dinking around on my phone and playing games and eating junk food. Not only do I like those things, but I spend a lot of time doing them. So it’s not just an indulgence. It’s a big part of my life.

Of course, even if I did put a whole bunch of time and effort into being deep and insightful—or maybe at least somewhat having earned that people think of me that way—then that would be frivolous, too. Because, really, in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t matter very much what people think of me. If I’m doing stuff because of what I want people to think about me, I’m already a long way over the frivolous cliff.

Maybe there’s no way to not be frivolous. Maybe it’s all just ridiculous. Maybe that’s the point. Maybe I can find some space inside that thought.

Or maybe I just didn’t leave myself enough time to write this week’s email, and got spun out with a bunch of, you know, making-a-living just before my proverbial midnight deadline.

We’ve been watching the latest season of Great British Baking Show and I was struck this morning by the parallels. On the show, they’re given a baking task with barely enough time to complete it. There are all kinds of distractions and problems, and they deal with them and get their bread and cakes baked. Nobody on the show ever just gives up and quits. They work until they’re out of time.

Life occurs a lot like that for me. Too much to do, not enough time. Granted, whatever time constraints I may be under are entirely my fault. Unlike the bakers on the show, sometimes I give up and procrastinate with a game on my phone or an IMDB rabbit hole or something equally frivolous. Because, really, when I feel like there’s too much to do what better way to prove it to myself than to waste time not doing any of it?

But I’m learning. I’m procrastinating less and less. I’m growing into more spaciousness.

Or at least that’s what I want you to think 😉

What about you? What did you notice in yourself over the holiday? I hope you had a happy Thanksgiving!